5:46
[snorts] I haven't figured out what my departing outfit's going to be. I feel like it should be something cool. I wonder if this will even be useful in Mexico. It feels Okay. This is it. But we're going to do just the front, right? Pink? What? Why do you have that look? I know. It's not like a whole head. No, that's crazy. I understand why he's upset. As soon as he knew I was going to be born, you know, he came over here um essentially to give me a better life. And now I'm kind of like, "Bye."
I was scared. Cuz I was like, "I'm so close to leaving and being in the clear." I was like, "Just imagine this getting" So my life has been that way, you know? It's like it's ironic where it's like I'm so close to the finish line or being free. I'm like, "Imagine getting pulled over." And then I just had a vision. I was like, "Can you pull it over?" And then ICE comes. a week before I leave, it's like just trying to get a burrito. And so it's kind of a reminder of why I'm leaving, you know? It's like I don't want to live in that kind of I've been in a really good denial for a long for this whole time.
Um It's just Yeah, it'll it's I think it'll be a while. It's going to be a little bit where I'm like, "Oh, wait, like he's not here, you know?" And my husband's really like getting the brunt of it. I don't know about um because you know you just like It's just so easy to be like snap at him And it's not only like that. It's just you know you just Like my family, it's just really hard. I won't see any of these places possibly ever again. country of what is it they call it? The freedom. But in your world it's like trapped. So it doesn't feel right. It just feels like what I have to do.
Cuz I think generally my goal was always "What's going to bring you peace?" And happiness, but you can't be happy all the time. She's so brown like you. Your mom's in a lot of these. Yes, cuz these are from my mom's photos. Oh, that was a bunch of I have a bunch of your I have a bunch of like photos from like high school, but they're for like a lot of like Abel and like your mom. That's just you. I think look at We were babies. You know, with the girls I'm like, "You guys are like so beautiful and perfect."
See, Britney was with me everywhere. She was a little baby. I used to just take her everywhere. I don't know how to go from being like, "Oh, let's visit Abel at the salon." I don't know how to go from being, "Let's bring him something from Pita Pit." I know, but it's not that far. I don't have a car. You could go visit him. Yeah. But I can't just do it any day. I know, but then you can vacation in Mexico. But I used to be able to just be walking distance. I feel like it hasn't hit us that you're leaving yet. Feels like we can still go visit you at the salon or you come over for the holidays. So I mean it gives us to go travel and visit you. And we're all going to miss you.
It's not going to be the same, but I know you got to go do what makes you happy. And we'll see you soon. I love you. I'm going to miss you. I think I'm just mad that I can't go. Yes. I am still in a sense of denial about all this. And when you first brought this to my attention, I was like, "Absolutely not. This cannot happen. This is not happening. It's next year. Think about it." And I'm just trying to cope the best that I can. I mean, my motivation too is for my own life, obviously to I don't know, inspire everyone here that I love. You know, I want to see the world.
Don't cry. [snorts] You guys really helped redirect my life a lot. [clears throat] Maybe you're too young, but um it was a hot mess before you guys were born. And then you were born. And I you know, I just redirected my life a lot. Um cuz I didn't want you guys to grow up the same way you know, that I did or that your mom did. So I mean, my motivation too is for my own life and yeah everyone I hope I can see you guys over there. But yeah that's all I have to say for now. I still have a chance. Turn back. No. You are officially crossing. Oh my god. This is it? Yeah. All right. Should I flip this camera off for the government? No, we're still in the car. I'll come right back.
Like this? Mexicali, wow. I feel different. I don't think I thought doing really high up. Okay, now I'm realizing the extent of what I just did.
